I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel. I focus on the pain, the only thing that's real.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Sincere thanks

Listening to:
Kiss Me by Sixpence None The Richer

ive not been feeling well for a few days, and in the middle of class of this recent monday. i encountered a muscle pull during class, it has something to do with the muscle nerves and such. which explains why i was having fever but yet my body was shivering.

thanks Teri, Rachel and Ian for helping, and taking care of me. and the rest of my college mates, you guys are the best and i couldnt have been feeling better now without your help. sorry for freaking you guys out.
also, thanks to Marc Wong for taking care of me before and after i was home. he stayed at my place till late to look after me. thanks alot Marc, and ill seriously miss you when you leave.


Sunday, September 27, 2009

My brothers are idiots :)

Listening to:
6:00 by Dream Theather



Saturday, September 26, 2009

Melancholic dream

Listening to:
I Miss You by Jamestown Story

a part of me didnt want to let him go. but when i did, deep inside me, i felt a sense of relief and at the same time - i was clouded with emotions i could not explain.

now i dont know what to hold on to. how am i moving forward?


Tears coming down, making lines on my face..

today marks the day ive finally let him go..


Thursday, September 24, 2009

Marilyn Manson is my only love, tonight.

Listening to :
Mutilation is the Most Sincere Form of Flattery by Marilyn Manson

as i wait for JWT's page to finish loading, i shall rant here.
im supposed to finish 2 assignments before this week ends and the only assignment that's been giving me a headache is Advertising Principles. stated in the assignment sheet, we were supposed to choose 5 agencies and list their contribution to the advertising world, etc. etc.. ive done 3 agencies, BUT, my laptop had to be a bitch and shut down on me. worst thing was, i did not save my work! wow abbie, that was a cherry top!!! ive tried restarting the lappie but couldnt work till an hour later. i am now behind schedule and at the back of my mind, it's telling me never to procrastinate my work again.

lately, stuff ard me has been screwing up - mouse, keyboard, msn, the net, microsoft word, and the lappie itself. i swear ive not yelled so much at and in front of the lappie before.

however, theres one thing that hasnt failed me and kept me holding onto the assignment is my adoring Marilyn Manson. he's there to scream my lungs out with and to comfort.
alongside MM would be Dream Theater :)

the fucking page is not loading.....!


Monday, September 21, 2009

Broken dreams and promises..

Listening to :
If You Live by the Sword, You Die by the Sword by Jamestown Story

why do i always put so much trust in people?


Sunday, September 20, 2009

My adorable nephew & niece

Listening to :
Far More by The Honorary Title

enjoy! :)


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Upcoming posts

Listening to :
Follow Me by Uncle Kracker

stay tune this weekend or the following week for a few upcoming posts bout em' college mates! :)


Smile :)

by Uncle Kracker

when i heard this song, it reminded me of Don. just exactly how i feel when he makes me smile :)
definitely one of my favourite song! hehhe


If a song could get me you

by Marit Larsen

beautiful, beautiful song :)


Tuesday, September 15, 2009

When i see you smiling back at me :)

Listening to :
Dont Look Back On Anger by Oasis

just a random post to show how much Don loves me ;P

*click for a larger view*

hehehe ;) this was taken months ago btw.


Saturday, September 12, 2009

Wait for me...

Listening to :
Last Train Home by Ryan Star

And if you wait for me,
I'll be the light in the dark if you lose your way.
And if you wait for me,
I'll be your voice when you don't know what to say.

I'll be your shelter, I'll be your fate.
I'll be forever, wait for me.


Thursday, September 10, 2009

I wish you were here

Listening to :
Hero by Chad Kroeger feat. Josey Scott

P.S., Stephiiekins, here are the pictures you wanted to see.
*click for a larger view*

two days ago, i got into a crazy argument with the brothers + mom, again. this time it was merely the same usual argument. i had enough, so i went out for a walk or maybe something else, too. i came back after an hour, had my ipod on full blast and took out one of my old random sketches; and spontaneously started drawing on my room wall.

its not as easy as drawing on paper, so i do think its not very good. but owels, ill be painting it off soon. im thinking of drawing an angel of death the next time.

you said youll be there for me, you said forever.
but now youre gone. does that mean your promise is broken?


When you expect perfection, youll get nothing in return.

Listening to :
The World's Greatest by R. Kelly

got this link off from my couz's facebook..
Will : this video is a propaganda in one aspect. (hmmm..)

enjoy :)


Wednesday, September 9, 2009

I love you and i miss you. Baby, i need you.

Listening to :
Gotta Get Through This by Daniel Beddingfield

baby, im still waiting..


Tuesday, September 8, 2009

In loving memories..

Listening to :

cousin Carmen, the Loh family, Au Yong, and anyone who is related or non related to him - anyone who has ever known him.
im sorry for your loss, my condolences..

im pretty bumped out too as Callie and i talked about how he was always so nice to us, treating us with care. i rmbr i used to find him all the time in HS and he has always treated me well when i was over at Carmen's house.

Rest In Peace
Grandpa Loh
You are dearly missed and will be deeply etched in each and every one of our hearts. May you look after us.


Saturday, September 5, 2009

Running to stand still

Listening to :
Hero by Enrique Iglesias

L-R :
Ian, Rachel, Teri, Aeries, Jules, Danial, Roy & Azrin.
(note: Eddy + John, etc are missing from the picture. lol)

college has been great for me. ive got amazing college mates and i really enjoy each and all of their company :)
on a short note, assignments are piling up. ngeh


Thursday, September 3, 2009


Listening :
As I Am by Dream Theater

what do you do when the only person who could make you stop crying is the one who made you cry?


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Ooh eeh ooh ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang ;)

Listening to :
Lullaby by Armor for Sleep

Dance like there's nobody watching.
Love like you'll never get hurt.
Sing like there's nobody listening.
Live like it's heaven on earth.
Speak from the heart to be heard.


Life feels different without you.

Listening to :
Tarzan & Jane by Toybox

its been a year. im not necessary happy, but i know im strong now and because of this - im proud. ive been to where most ppl've been to. i was hurt, but took the courage to end it all. this is something very personal to me, and im glad its all in the past. i no longer struggle and i really have to thank these few for helping me through - Pastor Eric, Kee Wei, Nick, JinYin, and most of all, Sean. thank you for not giving up on me, thank you for all your meaningful, wise words. thank you for being my shoulder to cry on, thank you for being there; and thank you for loving me through it all. i could've never done it without you guys.

life feels different now, but better in every way.